where am i?

    I'm an accounting student. When choosing this particular path, I realized I was subjecting myself to a group of individuals that would probably be classified as "nerds". I was ok with this because I've found that nerds tend to have a sort of Secret Nerd Club, or Smart People Club if you're more politically correct, and oftentimes congregate in study groups and help their fellow Nerds/Smart People out. I could use all the study help I can get, so I was willing to expose myself to such a lifestyle.

    Unfortunately, I didn't take into account the people who are Nerds, but who also contain some other traits that classify them as Weird. The thought didn't even cross my mind.

    Let's make the differences a tad clearer:

1. Nerd: "A foolish or contemptible person who lacks social skills or is boringly studious" (according to Wikipedia)

2. Weird: "eerie, uncanny, unearthly" (according to answers.com)

    Ok, so answers.com's definition is not really what I was intending, so let me break it down into my own biased explanations:

1. Nerd: a person that lacks social skills (a given) and who also tends to be ultra smart and you envy them because they can understand stuff really quickly and you can't, oh and they tend to have a mild case of acne

2. Weird: a person that does really distracting and inappropriate things in class and for some reason thinks no one else will notice

    Those are pretty vague, but they'll do.

    Basically, the people who surround me in my Business Finance class are Weird. I figured this out the other day when I showed up a little late for class and was shunned to the back row. (On a side note, that's one good thing about choosing this major: people are really serious about getting to sit up front, which leaves me at least the back four rows to spread out in.)

    As our professor began lecturing about straight-line depreciation on a long-term asset (you just gagged, didn't you?), I couldn't help but notice the fairly normal-looking gal to my right fiddling with her pen. Upon closer inspection, I realized she was digging gunk out of her fingernails and cuticles. It wasn't just one fingernail, it was all ten. And it wasn't just for a minute or two, it was for the whole damn class. I'm not lying. I watched. Why? Because it was really, really distracting.

    While watching her out of the corner of my eye, with probably a really disgusted look on my face, something else caught my attention. Farther to my right and up two rows, another fairly normal-looking girl was messing with her hair. Of course I got distracted again and began watching her instead of Fingernails. This girl took it up a notch. I watched as she reached up, found a stray strand of hair, twirled it around her fingers, gave it a taught little tug, unwound the now unattached hair from her fingers, held it like dental floss, and put it in her mouth (I'm assuming between her teeth).

    What. The. Hell.

    That also continued through most of the class. I couldn't help thinking "If she does this during every class, every day, how does she still have hair?!" Some people are just blessed I guess.

    Meanwhile, the boy next to Hair Eater was getting all worked up about this enormous leprosy-looking scab on his forearm. I watched, silently praying please God no, don't let him pick it, please no but to no avail. I stared in horror as he proceeded to pick and scrape and tug on his scab, flicking the newly detached pieces sporadically across the classroom. I even saw a fragment go flying and stick to Hair Girl's purse.

    If you're feeling nauseous, I apologize. But I had to give you a glimpse into my life as well as my evident future. Next time you hire an accountant, make sure they aren't Weird like Fingernails. Or Hair Eater. Or Mr.Scab.