so here's a funny story

   A few weeks ago, my roommate and pretty-much-sibling threw me an awesome bachelorette party at our little apartment. It was a great afternoon filled with white chocolate covered pretzels, “special punch”, dirty word games, laughter, sunshine, and friends.

Proof:

   Everyone was instructed to bring “downtown attire” to change into and our apartment eventually turned into a giant dressing room and hair/makeup studio.

   Getting to the root of this story: a few days after my bathroom had been bombarded with curling iron-wielding dress-wearing ladies, I was hanging up my hand towel when I saw something out of the corner of my eye in the drain of the left sink (I have 2, obvi). I should let you know I have a nasty fear of spiders and think they are the creepiest things in existence. Anyway, I stood there looking at the thing in the drain for a good 30 seconds when suddenly it moved! I swear it moved. I deduced right then and there that it was a nasty drain-inhabiting spider, gathered up my courage, took a tiny step closer to the sink, and quickly turned on the water to wash the hellish thing down to its sewer-y death. I only let the water run for a few seconds because I hate wasting water then took a peek to see if it was gone. It was still there! I figured I’d at least wounded it, though, so I left for class. Also, I’m not really sure how this is all relating to the fact that my bachelorette party occurred a few days prior to this situation. I think I subconsciously thought the drain-spider appeared because my bathroom had been a complete disaster ever since the female invasion. Anyway…

   Later that day I came home and it was still chilling there, all gross and whatnot. I turned on the water again but the turd still clung on! Irritated and grossed out, I ignored it and convinced myself that the probability of it crawling all the way to my bed and laying eggs in my ear cavity was pretty low.

   The same thing happened for about two more days: me peeking to see if it was there, getting irritated when it was, turning on the water, checking again, feeling exasperated and running away when it still didn’t go away. That was my life.

   Well on day four, I finally got fed up with having to avoid my left sink entirely due to fear. I somehow mustered up the courage to grab a Q-tip and prod at the thing to push it down the drain.

   It all happened in a matter of milliseconds: grab Q-tip, assume guarded stance, run water, aim Q-tip at spider…one…two…three…PROD!

   But the only thing that happened was the thing stuck to the Q-tip.

   Confused, I pulled my poking device out of the drain and attached to the end of it was…a craisin.

   So that was that.