AK day 2

   And it’s day two!
   To conclude day one’s activities, I:

• Walked down the street and ate a slice of delicious pizza bigger than a dinner plate. By myself.
• Hung out in my room and tried not to fall asleep watching House Hunters.
• Went to a meet-and-greet type thing at a restaurant called the Snow Goose and mingled with my competition (weird)
• Got scared because there was a tsunami warning! What?! I’m not in Montana anymore…
• Stared out my window at my fantastic ocean view
• Attempted to do some homework
• Succumbed to exhaustion at about 9:30. Best night’s sleep ever.

   Day two’s itinerary consisted of six hours at the Anchorage Zoo for an informational session, some team activities, more mingling, and, of course, animal viewing. It was pretty darn chilly walking around the zoo, even in my marshmallow coat and furry snow boots! Oh, Alaska. But talk about a beautiful day! Sunny, cloudless, and crisp.

   The group activity consisted of a Lego challenge of building a haunted structure and coming up with a creative story to describe it. I popped off with an idea to make a haunted tree and we just ran with it! We called it the Adam’s Family Tree (ha!) and this was our story:

“The Adams Family Tree is a very special tree hidden deep in the Alaskan forest! The leaves only fall on All Hallows Eve (aka: Halloween night) and depending on which branch they fall from, possess special powers! BUT! In order to get to the leaves, you must get past the scary fire-breathing SEC dragon! (Accounting humor…I apologize). The leaves from the white branches represent the spirit of Wednesday (the sister in the Adam’s family) and they are a magical stress reliever used for tax season! The leaves from the black branches represent the spirit of Cousin It and create a remedy for accounting-related baldness.”

   Pretty darn creative, right?

   Well we didn’t get first place. Or second. Or third. And there were only four teams. I think I might have gotten a high-five, though. I guess we missed the part where it had to be a “tower” and that height was one of the criteria…

   But still! We made a freakin’ tree! Whatevs. Rigged.

   After those festivities, we toured the zoo and I saw all sorts of critters! My favorite parts were:

• Going into the petting zoo and asking why the ducks kept running away from us. The petting-zoo-lady said “they don’t like to be pet”. In the petting zoo. Riiiight. Totally makes sense.
• Being peer pressured by one of the senior audit managers of KPMG to get the wolves to howl. Our whole group stood there and howled at the poor guys for ten minutes. Pretty amusing. No, they didn’t howl back.
• Watching one of the grizzly bears roll around on his back, grab his feet, and let his tongue hang out. So cute! Well, so scary…but so cute!

  

  Back to the hotel to submit an assignment online then it was off for a tour of Anchorage with an awesome girl I know from high school (hi Bri!) that lives here, followed by a delicious dinner at the hotel’s restaurant. I’m still on Montana time so when 10:00pm rolled around I was ready to crawl right into bed. Which I did! Another magnificent night’s sleep in my memory-foam king-sized bed with perfectly plump pillows. Oh the joys of being recruited!

AK day 1

   Today started wa-hay-hay-hay earlier than I would have liked it to. I ended up crawling into bed at about midnight last night and woke up every 45 minutes until my alarm went off because I just knew I was going to somehow manage to miss my 7:00am flight to Seattle. I woke up at 1:15 literally convinced it was time to get up and that I had slept through my alarm. It took myself a good thirty seconds or so to finally comprehend I’d only been asleep for a little over an hour. Brains are weird! The dreaded alarm sounded at 4:45 and I immediately felt this overwhelming sense of anxiety. I really really don’t like flying. I don’t know why. It’s not like I am an inexperienced air-traveler because I’ve gone on fairly long voyages each year for the past three years or so. I think I’ve narrowed it down to two things: take-off and landing. Take-off gives me the willies because there’s always that sense of “cross your fingers everything works properly as we ascend at a ridiculous speed to a ridiculous height!” I find myself literally crossing my fingers. Landing is the pits because I feel like landing gear is so sketchy – is it going to come out of its little hidey-hole on time? Is the tire going to explode upon impact? Is the run-way covered in a slippery substance? These things you just don’t know…until it’s happening and there’s nothing you can do about it. That’s kind of my new outlook on flying: if you’re already in the plane, buckled in and vulnerable, there’s simply not that much you can do to avoid a hairy situation.

   This trip was particularly scary for me because it’s the first time I’ve ever had to travel completely solo. I usually have Garrett there guiding me through bustling terminals while I hang out in la-la land observing my fellow travelers. This time it was all me. No one to say “that gate is only a five minute walk away” or “we have time to grab a snack before we board”. Nope. Just my own judgment and I today.

   Bozeman to Seattle was fine, minus the hour-long tarmac sesh at 7:30am. And poor me without any coffee! I had too many items to juggle and didn’t want to do the whole sorry-I-just-spilled-half-my-hot-beverage-on-you-as-I-shimmy-down-the-aisle song and dance. The plane was emp-ty which was very strange. Nice for a long-legged lassie such as myself, however! The ride was fairly turbulent and I definitely had to talk myself through it but I survived. My gate for my connecting flight to Anchorage was literally on the opposite side of the airport which was exactly what I was afraid of. Luckily I had more time to get there than I had anticipated and grabbed a coffee en route. Up through the food court, down two flights of escalators, onto the airport tram/train?, up another escalator or two, down the looong walkway, round the never-ending corner, and voila! I arrived in one piece and only managed to scald three of my fingers with my coffee.

   I managed to board and get situated on the crowded plane despite the realization that I’d be spending the next three hours and eighteen minutes of my life sardined between a middle-aged man with not-so-pleasant breath and a larger African American woman that really enjoyed utilizing our mutual armrest to its fullest. It turned out fine, though, and they were both great company. They didn’t even think I was that strange when I clenched my eyes shut during both take-off and landing. Another hour sitting on the tarmac (sigh) and we were off!

   Landed in Anchorage and thank goodness I remembered the layout of the airport from my trip last summer otherwise it could’ve been messy. Down to baggage claim, out to the taxi platform, into the taxi, 15 minute ride to the hotel, pay the taxi driver, check-in at the front desk, up to the 11^th floor, and then this:

   Ahhh, this won’t be so bad. I’ll be in the tub for the next three hours if you need me. 

my weekend away

Linking up with Syndal & Sar for a weekend update!

This weekend I…

   WENT HOME!!! I was on the fence about trekking home because a) it’s a 3 ½ hour drive and b) I didn’t feel 100% by the end of the week, but I’m so unbelievable glad I went! Going home is just the best. Always.

   Why? Because I…

   Got to hang with my BFF/sister! I had a sleepover with her in her dorm Friday night and yes, we did share the traditional freshman year twin bed. She even treated me to breakfast at the “Food Zoo”, aka campus dining hall, which was a glorious reminder about how much I do not miss dorm food. We then frolicked at the mall for a bit, trying on the weirdest glasses I’ve ever seen and holding humane society kittens. Not at the same time, I should add. Then we began the voyage home (an hour’s drive) to…

   Carve pumpkins, go thrifting for treasures, bake zucchini bread with homegrown deliciousness, and take “sister pictures” with the “third daughter” in the family – she’s adopted.

   The next morning consisted of my dad’s homemade “glop” for breakfast (SO GOOD), wedding talk, puppy dog nuzzles, coffee, packing, and goodbyes. The last one in the list wasn’t so fun. Neither was the second-to-last, actually.

   Then on the road again. Got treated to this delicious monstrosity. I didn’t even know this size existed??

   Now I’m back from my weekend getaway to the Best Place on Earth. Only a month until the next visit! I can hardly contain my excitement!

rather unexpected

   Last weekend, Garrett and I ventured to Great Falls because I had a second-round interview with an accounting firm. It was my first time traveling up to Montana’s very own “Windy City” and even though the visit was only for a few hours, I was looking forward to the adventure. It was nothing like I expected! I thought the town would be flat, desolate, and windy – the windy part was definitely true but that was it! The fall colors were gorgeous and the Missouri River awed me.

   My paternal grandparents both grew up in Great Falls so Garrett and I went on a scavenger hunt to find their childhood homes. It was fun winding around the neighborhoods and looking at all the old houses – it makes me itch to buy our first home! I can dream for hours about the cute front porch swing, cozy living room, and luxurious bathtub I just know I’ll have one day...

   At my interview, one of the women recommended Garrett and I take an alternative route back home through small mining towns and beautiful valleys. I jumped right on that opportunity! So after some coercing and promises of backrubs, Garrett gave in and we began the (slightly longer) trek back home.

   OHMYGOSH was it beautiful! The leaves were changing different colors, the river water was crisp and flawless, there was not a cloud in the sky, and only a few other cars on the road. I live for those afternoon drives!

   When we reached about the halfway point, Garrett was in the middle of some story or another and I was looking in his direction when I saw the last thing I ever expected to see: a cemetery! In the middle of nowhere! And not your typical plot-by-plot, organized, grid-like cemetery. This one consisted of grave markers simply scattered throughout a section of the forest. I immediately insisted we turn around and go check that sucker out! I have some weird fetish with old graveyards – yeah…I don’t really understand, either. When we were in New York, I spent about an hour in the cemetery across from the 9/11 Memorial just reading the names and exclaiming “holy crap that was a long time ago!”. So I did that same thing at this teeny tiny random cemetery in the trees.

   I think the oldest grave marker we saw was from a man who died in 1860. 1860!!! Can you believe that? That is so dang long ago. What was his life like? Where did he live? How the hey did he get to that tiny town in Montana? So many questions I wish I could get the answers to! Sometimes I think I should’ve been a historian instead of an accountant. Slightly different paths, eh? I am just fascinated with the homesteading era. I would love to take a few months and travel around Montana’s ghost towns and abandoned homesteads. Someday!

   There were also graves for five children from the same family. The youngest was 3 months at passing and the oldest was 19. I can’t imagine losing five children! My grandma (same one that grew up in Great Falls) made my family these amazing family history books tracing both sides of our family tree. I remember reading the brief biography she typed up about one of my ancestors who lost quite a few of their children as well. Wouldn’t it be strange to live in a time where childhood deaths weren’t unusual? You hear of children dying these days and it’s a tragedy – this poor little forest family lost five and not many people probably knew.

   I snapped a couple cell pictures in an attempt to capture the mood of the cemetery. I wish I had a better camera because my tiny pixel-y pictures don’t do it justice!

   As we were leaving, we passed a grave with a wind chime on the fence. I nonchalantly skimmed it with my finger as we walked by and it was sooooooo eerie! Note to self: wind chimes in cemeteries are not to be disturbed. Right after I did it, Garrett turned to look at me with the whole now-why-would-you-go-and-do-that look and we decided I probably just summoned some creepy spirit so we ran like heck back to the car, jumped in, and left the little cemetery in our dust! So far I haven’t noticed any ghosts following me…

in just one click

   Remember that week I kept complaining about being stressed out of my mind with internship interviews and whatnot? First off, let me just say HALLELUJAH, that time has passed! I'm done with my first round of interviews.

The good news:

   I got a call back from a local firm for a second round interview in Great Falls this Friday. (Yay...? Not really keen on spending a summer in Great Falls but we'll see how it goes).

   I received an offer to participate in a spring tax internship starting in January! AND I can use it as an elective and actually get course credits for it. PLUS it pays $12.50/hour. But...you have to work Saturdays. There are pros and cons of everything, aren't there?

But the best news of all (so far):

   I got an invitation to attend a second round interview/tour at the KPMG Anchorage office later this month!
   In one click I basically decided I'm going to do an internship in Alaska next summer. Why? Because if you're not interested, they encourage you not to attend the 2nd round interview because they pay to fly you up, house you, feed you, entertain you, etc and why would they do all that for you if you weren't at least considering that particular office? Looks like I'm considering it, because I confirmed my attendance yesterday and will be flying there on the 24th.

AH!

   Garrett's particularly excited about it because I think he secretly wishes he was an Alaskan Mountain Man.

   I've still got some pretty big decisions ahead of me. I wish someone would swoop in and figure out the best path for me to take, but it's all up to me. And that's scary. Hopefully I can somehow determine a way to make my last semester fairly unstressful, get internship experience, make money, and not regret letting other options pass me by.



Presenting: Why My Children Will (Probably) Hate Me

   I grew up in an extremely strict household compared to most of my friends.

Want to have a sleepover? Plan four days in advance.
Want to go to a movie with friends? Gosh dang better be the matinee!
Want to drive around with friends? Too bad.
Want a boyfriend? Funny.

   That was my adolescence in a nutshell. (My mom’s probably reading this and rolling her eyes). Sure the ‘rents might see it differently but that doesn’t matter, right? Right.

   After spending years mourning over my tragic preteen existence, I decided I was going to be the coolest parent ever when it came my time. I’d never go into my kids’ rooms, always have goodies in the house, not set a curfew, let them date, let them pick out all their clothing from Abercrombie&Fitch, never ask what they’re doing, etc. You know, basically the opposite of everything my parents actually did.

   I resolved I was going to be nothing like my parents. I decided I was going to be awesome.

   Well now I’m old and I changed my mind.

Presenting: Why My Children Will (*Probably) Hate Me *Maybe I’ll have nerd children and they’ll actually enjoy my rules. This you never know.

1. What in the Sam’s Hell are you wearing.

   I have this extremely vivid memory of being told to change my shirt before school by my dad. So weird. I had recently returned from a shopping trip with my grandma where she bought me this really cute teal sweater from Abercrombie&Fitch (on sale, mind you). I absolutely LOVED IT. It was disgustingly tight and nearly see through – what more could you want as a fourteen year old girl? I’m sure my grandma intended on me wearing a modest tank underneath because it was fairly revealing, but of course I had a different plan. I wore my skimpiest white tank top with little sequins underneath the sweater instead. It was fun pretending to be a corner girl while it lasted. I walked down the stairs, saw my dad, got the lecture, went back upstairs, changed, hated my life. Looking back, I can completely understand my dad’s reaction. A 5’7” 95lb 14 year old girl with no curves to her name wearing a shirt meant for an adult filmstar? Not pretty. He was definitely looking out for my best interest.

   What did I learn from this? Well immediately following the incident, I made a deal with myself that my daughters would never be confined to looking “respectful” – how boring! But now I have changed my mind. It makes me cringe when I see little girls running around in Daisy Dukes and spaghetti strap tank tops. Why don’t you just skip around in your panties and training bra? You’re basically showing it all already, anyway. My daughters will wear t shirts and capris even on the hottest day of the history of the world. No one needs to see the complete contour of their baby bodies! Yucky. What are you attempting to “show off” anyway?

2. 5738 texts in one month?! How is that humanly possible?!

   We’re starting off with an (almost) exact quote from my dad upon receiving the first phone bill after gifting me a phone with a texting plan. My response was something along the lines of, “that’s not even that much! Some kids text, like, every minute.” Leave it to my math-genius father to calculate how often I would have had to send a text in order to accumulate over 5000 in a month. It was pretty disturbing. The only reason I was able to convince my parents to get me a phone was because my sister and I recently picked up jazz dancing (short-lived) which required us to stay afterschool. The class ended at different times so my parents never knew when to be there to pick us up. Enter My First Phone! It was Roxy® themed and instantly became my Siamese twin (because it was always attached to me, get it?). Texting was my forte and I quickly became the Family Freak due to my overly-muscular thumbs. Did having a phone benefit me? Not really. Did it help me make friends? No. Did it distract me in every aspect of life? Yes.

   Will I let my kids have cell phones at fourteen? Nope. Unless they pay for it.

   Is there anything more annoying than witnessing eight to fourteen year olds playing with cellphones? What are they doing? Trading stocks on the NASDAQ? No, they’re being immature and irritating tweens, that’s all. Nothing beneficial from this electronic device. The only reason I see it being acceptable is if you don’t own a house phone and your child isn’t with an adult most of the time. Other than that, go do a puzzle.

3. No, not until you’re 16.

   My mom was raised believing you shouldn’t allow your children to date until they’re 16. Doesn’t that seem young? I see 16 year olds now and think, “It’s fairly obvious your mom packed your lunch today. In that case, you probably shouldn’t be experimenting with the opposite gender until your independent enough to make your own PB&J.” But I can tell you right now that I thought I was so mature at that age. I was wise, seasoned, knowledgeable, and opinionated about every little thing. I knew I could handle having a boyfriend, piece of cake! Everyone else was out there trying it out. But not me. No dates, no hang outs, no co-ed dinner get-togethers, nada. Just me and my fam, livin’ it up. I hated every second of it and had a countdown until my 16^th birthday on my wall for years. Years! It was the utmost form of torture.

   Will my kids date before sixteen? You bet your bottom dollar they will not!

   Such a pointless activity. Let’s be honest here: what is on the minds of preteen boys? Ugly, ugly things. What’s on the mind of a preteen girl? Pretty clothes, puppies, and romantic comedies! But what’s the number one weakness of all insecure, maturing, awkward tween females? Peer pressure. So basically the guys win, girls lose, reputations suffer. Even though 16 is still pretty young, it’s two years away from technically being an adult. I deem it an ok age to date. And luckily, so does my fiancé. It’ll be interesting to be on the other side of the fence, inflicting instead of suffering. Mwaha.

   Needless to say, my kids will probably daydream about my nonexistence and tell me things like, “No one else has these rules!” and “It’s not fair!” I know that because that’s what I said. Over and over and over again. But, in all honesty, I couldn’t be happier about the way I’ve turned out. I have a sense of self-worth, I have goals and dreams, I have an amazing and loving relationship, and my family is still #1. So thanks Mom and Dad, I guess you weren’t so bad after all.

the bubble.

   So if you’ve been around me anytime within the last few weeks, you’ve probably heard me referencing something I call “the bubble”. It’s something I made up, or something I heard somewhere that I felt the need to elaborate upon, and now something I constantly refer to when trying to solve problems. Everyone’s problems.

   Here’s the breakdown.

   What do you do every day? I personally wake up fairly early, go to school all day, go to work, do homework, sleep, repeat. That’s my agenda for four of the seven days that make up my weeks. Not so bad, right? It’s manageable.

   It’s not necessarily the activities that my days consist of that create the “bubble”, it’s my surroundings. I go to the same buildings on campus, the same classrooms, deal with the same people. At some point along the way, my world has shrunk.

   Some days I forget where I live. The reality is I’m currently residing in Montana, a state some people don’t even know exists. Yes, I have been asked what state Montana is in… Beyond that, I forget I am living in a very small town located in this apparently “pretend” state. What’s more is I’m attending a University that may be considered “big” in Montana standards, but is probably a joke to most secondary educational institutions out there. And even more, I’m enrolled in one of the school’s smallest degree programs.

   See where I’m going here?

   Everything I stress about, get emotional about, am concerned about, dream about, and excel at is inside this teeny tiny bubble I have created for myself. It’s so hard for me to see beyond the walls of my own little world sometimes – I literally forget that there is more to life than what I do every day.

   It’s disturbing, really.

   Everything I do is something I consciously chose. No one is forcing me to get up early, no one demands I take the classes I do, I haven’t signed a contract in blood that I have to work two jobs.

   How, then, am I able to complain about everything?

   It’s strange to me that this “bubble” concept is something I am aware of and yet tend to regularly ignore.

   As morbid as it is, I could die in a couple years. Heck, I could die tomorrow. It freaks me out to think that my short life would predominately consist of stress, unhappiness, and delusion. I in no way regret attending college and trying as hard as I do, that’s just who I am and what I currently believe is in my best interest. But seriously, self – you need to get out of this routine of self-pity. It’s unattractive, unhealthy, and stupid.

   This is what is out there:

   When I was eleven I was presented with the question, “what do you want to be when you grow up?” I wrote:

be happy & healthy

   It’s not too late to follow my own advice, I don’t think.