not. again.

   A year or two ago, I bought a set of three really cute dangly earrings from Target and I have a hard time not wearing them. For instance, today I’m wearing the black pair. Yesterday I’m pretty sure I wore the silver ones. Gold isn’t really my thing, but that pair gets worn pretty often as well.

   Anyway, I’ve always taken off those little rubber-stopper-thingies that come on the backs of dangly earrings and tossed them in the trash. I never had a use for them and, to be honest, I thought they looked kind of tacky. I never had a problem with losing an earring, either, until I purchased the puffy coat.

   I love my puffy coat, don’t get me wrong. It keeps me warm during my thirty minute walks to and from campus in the snow, so I definitely can get past its minor flaws. There are two things I’ve noticed about it that do, however, present problems.

1.       You know when you were little and you found it hilarious to rub a blown up balloon on your head? Well 15 years later, the affect isn’t as cute when I peel off my jacket in class and my hair makes it look like my head just exploded. Why, static electricity?

2.       The puffy collar hits me right below my earlobes, which doesn’t mesh well with dangly earrings. Getting to this in a moment.

   Another issue I’ve encountered is I look like the black Michelin Man. After eating twenty seven Twinkies. But! I’m okay with that.

   So last year, on just an ordinary (torturous) day of school, I donned one of the three pairs of danglies and strapped on my puffy jacket to head to class. Upon returning after about four hours, I reached up to tuck my hair behind my ear when I noticed one of my earrings was missing. I was devastated. I stopped to investigate my scarf, my collar, my hair to see if I was somehow tangled in hopes of finding the missing item. It was gone. I wasn’t willing to give up that quickly, however, so I turned around and backtracked the way I had come.

   The Jewelry God must have been on my side that day because about 30 yards back to campus I found it! Nestled in the snow, unharmed and sparkly, I spotted it and literally squealed one of those awkward “yeeee!” sounds. I smiled as I began walking back home, my earring safely dangling from my right earlobe.

   After having such a terrifying experience, you’d think I’d at least contemplate sticking a rubber-stopper-thingy on the backs of those earrings to keep it from happening again. But I didn’t. Instead, I basically reenacted the incident the next day.

I believe it was my black pair, though.

   So the very next day, I was walking home and, as I stepped inside my apartment, I saw in my reflection in the window that I was not symmetrical. I was once again missing an earring. Immediately irritated as well as worried, I threw down my school-related objects and began retracing my steps, this time jogging. I wasn’t expecting to find it because for one, the Jewelry God only works miracles every couple months and for two, I was hungry and the further I got from my house, the more willing I was to just turn around and eat the leftover pasta that was calling my name.

   As I was jogging, I realized there wasn’t much hope. I had been everywhere on campus that day and couldn’t remember the last time I knew I had it. Slowing to a walk, I decided to give up. My poor, poor black dangly…

   But then! Peeking out from under some old, discolored snow was something black and shiny. As I approached it, I couldn’t believe my luck. I found it! What fortune! I snatched it up, wiped the mud off, and un-bent it all with a huge smile on my face. I was so pumped that I jogged all the way back home despite the weird looks I was receiving as well as the fact that I usually do not jog. Ever.

   Since those two very frightening experiences, I now make a point to attach the rubber-stopper-thingies on the backs of all of my dangly earrings. I have a hard time trusting the Jewelry God to provide me with another miracle any time soon. And who wants one dangly anyway? Lame.